Archive for the '‘keit' Category

Stop me if you’ve heard this one-

March 20, 2009 - כ"ד אדר תשס"ט

Ok, every Jewish kid has heard the story of some high school couple who manage to “accidentally” do the nissuin thing and end up needing a get.  Maybe it’s happened before (and maybe it will happen again*), maybe not.  But now, in this Brave New Intarweb, you can point to a Google search to show that it has:

14-year-old girl becomes Israel’s youngest-ever divorcee – Haaretz

I picked the Haaretz coverage because it covered the best detail – not the consummation of the marriage – but the 10,000 NIS payoff by the groom’s family to get the girl to go away.

* Good bye, BSG.  You were the show I would have made.

The dumbing of ‘merica.

January 9, 2009 - י"ג טבת תשס"ט

For fuck’s sake, it’s bad enough you wreck the KJV, but seriously?
I mean, Jews go through the bother of making these wonderful texts, some nice goyim translate them reasonably well, and then the evil goyishe masses have to ruin them.

Well maybe Prussian Blue can put it in song form. Oh, wait…

Can’t be fooled.

January 1, 2009 - ה' טבת תשס"ט

The children are right.  It is not an indictment; it is reconciliation.

The academics are right, albeit inadvertently so:  German is beautiful; the fault lies in those to whom its legacy is bestowed.

(D)er schreibt wenn es dunkelt nach Deustschland.

Really late. I know.

November 25, 2007 - ט"ו כסלו תשס"ח

But I wanted to finally close this tab.

Bedspread line named ‘Nazi Collection’ outrages Indian Jews – CNN.com

At least they weren’t planning to include lampshades and soap in their home furnishings line.

As an aside, I wonder what basis the Jewish community has to sue / seek an injunction (as mentioned in the article). I wouldn’t be surprised, given its history, that India has laws prohibiting the defamation of religion or some such.

About that trip to Miami… apparently it was b’shogeg.

October 3, 2007 - כ"א תשרי תשס"ח

How did I miss this?!!? Miami is ASSUR!!

Happy Holiday!

May 2, 2007 - י"ד אייר תשס"ז

Which one?  Why, Pesach Sheni, the unknown holiday.  The holiday of sufferers, those who were tameh or otherwise unable to properly celebrate Pesach – when a proper celebration included animal sacrifice.  The holiday, as unfortunate as those for whom it was created, has lost its relevance and no modern observances (though some eat matzah as a customary nod).

You’d think we could at least get haircuts, but Lag Ba’Omer is four days away, anyway.

A disagreement for the sake of the palate

April 8, 2007 - כ' ניסן תשס"ז

While I support the endeavors of the maligned Kitniyot Liberation Front I cannot find within me to chide those who abstain from corn, for without their inane chumra, we would be without real Coke.

Why America is so Grand: Reason #528

December 17, 2006 - כ"ו כסלו תשס"ז

The ketchup packets at White Castle have a hechsher.

l’ma’aseh…

December 14, 2006 - כ"ג כסלו תשס"ז

So I’m having this party next week, and one of the people helping (hopefully) with the cooking isn’t Jewish. No big deal, I’m starting the oven, and will probably have a hand in some stage of cooking each batch anyway, so there are no real bishul akum issues. Now, in simple terms, bishul akum only applies to food which cannot be eaten raw (i.e. cooking is a required step in its consumption) and is of sufficient quality that it falls under the category of oleh l’shulchan ha-melech (or oleh al shulchan melachim), that is, sufficient to be placed upon a kings table.

Now, with the rise of processed foods, where a base level of quality is assured (at least in the U.S.) a variety of interpretations of this standard have appeared (which was a subjective standard to begin with) ranging from the very lenient approach which restricts the definition to what the White House would consider using for a state dinner, to a stringent approach which applies to pretty much all canned goods where the other technical points of the definition is met.

So what are latkes? Let’s take the maikel (lenient) approach mentioned above (held by Soloveitchik). Would latkes be served at a state dinner? Well, while not the highest of cuisine, I could imagine latkes – not made from a mix – being used to placate Jewish campaign contributors in the “me too” spirit of the American holiday season. While latkes are more or less glorified tater-tots, is this use enough to term them as oleh l’shulchan ha-melech – and if so, does it fall into the category year round?

Then again, I know one Jew who was at a Democratic fundraiser in New York on Pesach some ten years ago, and ate matzah at a table with Clinton. (He apologetically began to explain, whereupon Clinton interrupted with “Matzah! I love that stuff,” and took some to eat. The man knows how to work a crowd.) Does that halachically elevate lechem ani to the table of the king too?